Heeding advice of Local Viet’s.
If you’re starting out with dating local Vietnamese women, heed the advise of the locals. Because being turning up your nose might be costly.
I write this post for you to navigate the world of dating Vietnamese women. They have all kinds of body types you might be into, and you might just be able to find one that has humor and doesn’t judge.
A quick note is that while reading this post, keep in mind that there are exceptions to the rules.
Put your western dating norms on hold. Get to know the culture and dig in.
Vietnamese women WANT expats.
David and Alex meeting Vietnamese girls in Saigon!
I scoured the internet and I found a great video about David and Alex meeting Vietnamese girls, by asking them to take a picture. I suggest you watch it, because I found it entertaining!
And I have more suggestions in store for you!
It’s considered ‘normal’ for dating to funnel into marriage. And because of that norm, most women don’t date for fun only. A quick note for success: ideally you’d want a girl that’s nuts about you vs. one that’s just testing out the waters to see if she can fall in love with you or not.
Vietnamese women tend to take care of their partners. It’s just one of those things that seem ingrained into the culture. They will sacrifice love for financial security for themselves and their family. That said, note that she’ll take care of you even if she didn’t marry out of love.
Public display of affection makes Vietnamese girls feel awkward. So I suggest not holding hands or kissing, unless you find her explicit permission. That’s because she has to feel safe and keep feeling safe. (Part of your job as the guy!)
If you enjoy driving around town with a scooter, you’re in good shape. Because most girls like their man to be the driver.
Women give out their phone numbers like you give out treats during halloween. It’s not a big deal.
Meet the in-laws, because they might end up wanting to play a huge part in your life.
Prepare for her friends/family to tag along the first few dates.
I know I have a pretty sarcastic sense of humor myself, and if you do too, I’d suggest refraining from using it until she gets to know you better. This is a good moment to remember that whatever you do, her feeling safe is a huge win. That’s why you don’t make her feel unsafe with dark or sarcastic humor.
If she’s investing time into you through a dating website or via chat, and you want her too, that’s a good thing! Because looking at the culture it could mean that she’s already considering it a relationship.
And if I may suggest a dating site to start talking with Vietnamese women, it’s VietnamCupid. I’ve written a review about the site! It’s run by an Australian team of Westerners, signing up is easy (and there is a cheap paid option also, if you’re ready to dig into the Vietnamese dating scene fort he win!) Read the review here.
This is a little insight I got from the web: “if you want to know how your relationship is progressing give her a ride on your motorscooter. And if she wraps her arms around your waist then you’re in”.
if you’ve asked a woman out and on a date and you notice her hesitating, suggest her the option to bring along a friend of hers. This goes back to the culture, and women liking to feel safe. Play your cards right and she might open up more.
Warming sign: if she asks for money on the first date. Do what you may, you’re forwarned now.
Prepare a separate room for your girlfriend if she’s staying over. If at all, just for appearance sakes (for her side of the family, for her friends, etc). You’ll see the same type of situation if you’re staying over at her’s
Come bearing gifts when you return from travel. No matter how small the gifts, her family will appreciate it.
Doing things by yourself is generally frowned upon. If you’re in a public space around dinner time, you’ll see that most people are in pairs or groups. It’s a cultural thing. People might act curious about why you’re alone. No friends? Are you ill? Going through a rough patch?
Learn how to negotiatie, Viet style. It’s a nice way to show yourself, and your Vietnamese GF that you understand how minds work.
Vietnamese women have been duped too, just as expats have been. Currently that’s the way of the world. You just don’t hear about it much, because let’s be frank, you’re not a Viet girl. Coming back to the frame of a woman feeling safe, well, this ties into that idea.
I’d suggest you don’t gossip. It might feel nice in the moment, but the implications are not that nice. The only reason you’d want to judge a person is as part of what you’re going to do.
If you prefer a friends with benefits relationship or one night stands, you might find success with single mothers, older women and rich women. That’s because they seem less coy about premarital sex.